Notes from a Desi Geek

Microsoft is famous for asking brain teasers during interviews. Here’s one of them:

You’ve got a chicken, a fox, and a bag of grain on one side of the river, and a boat that holds you and one of the chicken/fox/grain. If the fox is left alone with the chicken, he’ll eat it. If the chicken is left alone with the grain, he’ll eat it. How do you get all across the river so that nobody/nothing gets eaten.

Answer:

Feed the grain to the chicken, then feed the chicken to the fox. Take the fox over, then induce vomiting on each animal in reverse order.
[Source]

When I read that, I laughed so hard that my stomach started hurting and I had to share it.

The other day I was chatting to one of my friend and I wanted to tell her something like

Your minutes NOT EQUAL TO My minutes.

And I wrote,

Your mins != My mins.

I realized that I am using programming construct ‘!=’ instead of writing ‘not equal to’. Does it have anything to do with the fact that for last 3 days I am coding for 15 hours a day?

When was the last time you used a computer lingo in your conversation with non geek?

JD

John asks:

Mac OS X 10.1 - Puma
10.2 - Jaguar
10.3 - Panther
10.4 - Tiger
10.5 - ?

And I say……

Mac OS X 10.5 - Pussy!
What’s your opinion?

JD

For my 2nd inning of blog, I had decided that I would avoid publishing post which I have not produced, but I would like to make an exception once again. Sudhir has once again come up with an excellent post about IT industry and estimates for a project execution. (Btw, I highly recommend his blog for your regular dose of humour) Here’s the copy:

Wonderful definitions of designations at office.

1) Project Manager is a Person who thinks Nine women can deliver a baby in One month.

2) Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a baby.

3) Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

4) Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.

5) Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.

6) Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t need a man or woman; they’ll produce a child with zero resources.

7) Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.
Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.

If you are a geek and your girlfriend is also a geek, then these HTTP Panties makes the perfect gift for this Valentine!

Buy them from ThinkGeek.

Btw, I am going to get this tee myself .

One politician, One thief & One Programmer died & went straight to hell. Politician said “I miss my country, I want to call my country and see how everybody is doing there. He called and talked for about 5 minutes, then he asked “Well, devil how much do I owe you???? The devil says “Five million dollars” The Politician wrote him a cheque and went to sit back on his chair.

Thief was soo jealous, he starts screaming, “My turn! I wanna call the my group members, I want to see how everybody is doing there too” He called and talked for about 2 minutes, then he asked “Well, devil how much do I owe you????

The devil says “Ten million dollars” With a smug look on his face, he made a cheque and went to sit back on his chair.

Programmer was even more jealous & starts screaming, “I want to call other IT person too, He called other IT person and he talked for twenty hours about various technologies and Project Managers, he talked & talked & talked, then he asked “Well, devil how much do I owe you???? The devil says “Twenty dollars”. Programmer is stunned & says “Twenty dollars??? Only ??”

The devil says “Well if you make a call from one hell to another hell, it’s local”.
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If you have ever worked in Indian IT MNC and slogged for 10 out of 12 months, I am sure you will be able to relate to this joke. I know, I do! (via Sudhir)